Gratitude of Attitude

“People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.” John C. Maxwell

Our culture has an affinity for catch phrases, slogans, buzzwords and tag lines. Whether they define a company or part of a mission statement of an institution, these mottos and mantras are designed to associate meaning and reflect purpose that directly identifies these companies and institutions with a desired personification. They are the representation of who they are and the values that they promote. People, like companies and institutions, are similarly defined by personal axioms, albeit not those that are affixed to our bumpers or refrigerators nor appear on our business cards or letterheads. Rather, it is our attitudes that establish who we are and how we are viewed by others.

Thomas Jefferson once remarked, “Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” Much can and should be said about the manner in which we think, and how our attitudes are entirely founded upon our thoughts and perceptions. Through my coursework, certification process and experiences employing CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), I have gained great insight to the inner workings of the mind and how essential a positive attitude is in life in general and education in particular.

Dr. Ben Martin who has written on matters of depression, ADHD, anxiety and several other areas of human behavior, defines CBT as, “a short-term, goal-oriented psychotherapy treatment that takes a hands-on, practical approach to problem-solving. Its goal is to change patterns of thinking or behavior that are behind people’s difficulties, and so change the way they feel … CBT works by changing people’s attitudes and their behavior by focusing on the thoughts, images, beliefs and attitudes that we hold (our cognitive processes) and how this relates to the way we behave, as a way of dealing with emotional problems.” It is troubling, however, that such “treatment” is reserved to just that, treatment. I would propose that we would all infinitely gain and deeply appreciate a taste of CBT, and, furthermore, so would our schools.

It is indeed our culture that has created the phrase “attitude of gratitude.” Yet, gratitude is not the only attitude we desperately need to nurture among our youth population (and adult), though it certainly is one of the more vital virtues. Our attitudes require an entire overhaul. Albert Einstein was astute in his observation when he said, “Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.” Our attitudes are the foundation of our character, and if we wish to help develop and support our students’ positive character, then we must dedicate more time to address them.

Hans Selye, the Hungarian-born endocrinologist who spent a lifetime researching the phenomenon of stress, remarked, “Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one.” Particularly in an age where anxiety is rampant, we must place more attention on producing resilient students with strong, positive attitudes. We must “stress” the importance of building quality attitudes, primarily through proper modeling. We must highlight how crucial a positive attitude is. And how grateful we must be when we have achieved one for then we would have established the most distinguished and fulfilling slogans for ourselves.

“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.” Winston Churchill

Improvement Movement

“If you have a positive attitude and constantly strive to give your best effort, eventually you will overcome your immediate problems and find you are ready for greater challenges.” - Pat Riley

People often view the opening weeks of a new school year as challenging. Aside from the normal hurdles one requires to overcome, it coincides with a host of Jewish holidays, commencing with Rosh Hashana, the New Year. Standing at the threshold of what we anticipate to be another successful year of academic and personal growth, we are met with the most inconsistent school schedules possible. Between Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur and Succos, it feels to many that the month of September is primarily spent in shul rather than school.

Perhaps the most encouraging moments during this time is the sounding of the shofar. Its fleeting, yet powerful sound is designed to resonate within our hearts and souls, awakening us to contemplate our deeds of the past year in self-reflection and sincere penitence. Yet, this past week granted me an even deeper understanding, one that brought incredible insight into this meaningful custom. While I am unfortunately not well-trained in blowing the shofar, I had no choice but to step into the role this year. Before the very first time attempted to blow the shofar, I prefaced it in front of tahe Middle School that they should not expect a promising performance. Thankfully enough, however, I managed to go a few days with relative success.

This past week, however, there was one particular day in which I simply could not produce a single sound. The moments passed, I continued with all my might, yet to no avail. Finally, after what seemed to be an eternity, I managed to sound the shofar properly. As I placed the shofar on a chair, I picked up the microphone, and shared the thought I had while trying to blow the shofar with the students.

“While I stood here trying to fulfill the custom of blowing the shofar, I was quickly reminded how we each have our strengths and weaknesses. Clearly, blowing the shofar is not a skill I possess. And that is just perfectly fine. It makes me think how I have to work on it. How I have to practice. This is the message I can learn in this month of Elul. I can use this moment to reflect on the areas I must still work on; the areas of weakness that I must focus more on this year. We can all use this as an opportunity to consider what we need to improve in preparation for Rosh Hashana.”

As the martial arts superstar, Tony Jaa, correctly asserted, "Never be afraid to fail. Failure is only a stepping stone to improvement." Failure is part of life, yet so is improvement. I was thankful for the chance to fail so that I could be reminded of yet another area I must improve in the days and months ahead, G-D willing. By embracing failure, we recognize our humanity, bringing us closer to a greater understanding and meaning in life. We must never be ashamed of our shortcomings, rather they should inspire and motivate us to continue growing.

What a powerful way to being the new school year in Middle School - by creating an improvement movement.

“Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence.” - Vince Lombardi